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I originally wrote some of this on my sisters Facebook page in response to her posting this article. However I felt it was more appropriate to write on my Blog.
Thanks Sis for stirring this response in me and getting me blogging again. I have so much I need to write. Some things I have been learning and struggling with, since my last Blog post.
Disclaimer: I am in no way saying I am perfect and always eat or put "healthy" things into my body.I am continually changing and learning.
McDonald's......don't get me started. My kiddos used to get sick when they ate their nuggets etc. I can't remember the last time I have been there.
Anyone ever see the movie "So I Married an Axe Murderer"? A certain part in the movie the "Dad" is talking to his son about KFC saying that they put a chemical in there food to make you crave it nightly. It is a funny part in the movie but in some ways so true. (I don't approve of the language and won't watch that movie anymore.) However I am finding most people don't want to know what is in their food, and don't care about what they eat. People say they want to be "healthy" but still have to eat foods that are : too sweet, too processed, too refined, and already made and convenient. They rather stay ignorant about it so they won't feel responsible/guilt if it is bad for them or their children. What they don't know won't kill them. Right?
Some people think I am extreme in my food views... I am :) If you look up an extremist in the dictionary my picture is probably there. Some people will do the opposite of what I do with their children, just to prove that they aren't like me. I want to be "EXTREMEly" different than the mainstream UNHEALTHY disease ridden society of ours. I may get a horrible disease someday. But I will know I did my best to prevent it. The rest is out of my hands.
I used to be a person who never cared about what I put in my mouth and never looked at the ingredients in food etc. etc. My children ate "free" breakfasts at school, and reduced lunches. I didn't even care. It took me time to change and to teach my family. It is an ongoing learning process. Especially when it comes to "social" occasions. Now I make their lunches everyday, go out of my way to help them "fit in" within reason. Deal with questions and the uneasiness of people around me who don't know how to handle me and my family being "different".
Our family has been hit HARD with illnesses these past 2 months and I realized I have judged others harshly when it comes to being sick. Thinking well they just need to change their "lifestyle". I blame myself when my kiddos get sick thinking that I did something wrong. We ate unhealthy or something. When probably the case is that we are "human". I can testify in my own life though that I know that I need to exercise, get enough rest and eat healthy to BE healthy. It isn't just doing one of those things that works. I allowed myself to get exhausted while I was taking care of my sick children. I haven't been able to exercise like I've wanted (due to being pregnant). So I became sick. so sick that I was struggling to take care of my children and their needs. I thought man it would be so convenient right now to have prepackaged dinners to feed my kids, go out and buy fast food etc. But I didn't.
I am a person who loves alternative medicine and in fact I don't have the best attitude when it comes to conventional medicine. (Sorry all my friends who are in the medical field). Stay with me here..... til two mornings ago and I woke up around 2 AM and my head hurt so bad. Bending over just killed me. I had tons of other things going on one of them being a fever. I was so COLD I was constantly taking baths or showers. My body was trying to fight. I researched about sinus infections online and learned a lot. I believed deep down that I had an infection and had one last month too that didn't go away. My dilemma was that I "hate" antibiotics and felt I needed to continue to do "natural" things garlic, humidifier, water, neti pot, eucalyptus oil, etc.
So when I finally lost it and I was so "tired" of struggling with this. I was being mean to my kids and my husband. I was becoming hateful. (I am not normally a hateful person.) Depression was kicking in because I couldn't do all the things that a mom had to do. I also was feeling the Lord was trying to teach me something. (Not punish me because I believe he doesn't want us to hurt or suffer.) I couldn't believe that I was having such a hard time with this "sickness". I mean really what about all the people with chronic illnesses, people who take care of their children everyday that have a terminal illness. And here I am 5 days into a sinus infection (not including 3 weeks last month) and taking care of one sick child after another, and I couldn't handle it! What was wrong with me? I didn't want others to come over and help because I didn't want to expose them to whatever was causing our fevers. I felt I had to do it alone.
This scripture kept coming to my mind earlier when researching: (Proverbs 3: 5-6) "Trust in the Lord with all thine heart. And lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge him. And he shall direct thy paths." Oh man did I want my path to be directed. But I believe I was preventing it because of my "own understanding". I prayed, it wasn't the most formal of prayers I am sure it was more desperation than a prayer of faith. I asked what do I do? He said go to the doctor and get antibiotics. (Well he knows what I think of that.) He said If you don't you won't get better! So stubborn me. I still was thinking of other ways to do things. I rather of had all the other things work that I've tried but they weren't working. I couldn't go on in pain like this. (I did end up taking pain relievers it took the edge off.) So the Lord was telling me to do something I didn't want to do. I trust him right? I believe in him right? Do I BELIEVE he knows ALL? Then I needed to do what he told me to do whether I "liked" it or not.
So I called a nurse to get her advice.....why would I need advice from a nurse when I was told what to do already? After telling her my symptoms she told me that I needed to be seen within 4 hours and I shouldn't drive. She said call your midwife since you're pregnant they need to take care of you and tell her what I told you. If they can't get you in then go to your primary Dr. If they can't get you in go to the ER. Well after more phone calls. A nurse from my midwife's office calls and I retell her my symptoms. She kind of cuts me off and asks me if I had a primary Dr.? I said, "Yes." She said, "Well since this isn't pregnancy related you need to be seen there." I didn't tell her this but HELLO since I AM PREGNANT wouldn't that make this PREGNANCY RELATED!
Oh my I was getting frustrated. FINE, I called my Dr. they said no sorry we can't get you in. I 'm not even including my insurance calls! So final options ER or URGENT CARE. Urgent care was what I wanted to avoid. But I didn't want to pay $100 at an ER. So I called a "Saint" My mother-in-Law. She dropped everything at work came over packed us up and and loaded all of my laundry to do too! We went to the Urgent care. I was prepared to be there for 4 hours since I have experience that in the past with my kiddos. (I had tissues, my own trash bag, a blanket since I was cold, headphones, magazines,water, journal, scriptures etc.) After only a couple hours I was heading to the store to go pick up what the Lord told me I needed ANTIBIOTICS oh and I bought PROBIOTICS too. By yesterday I was feeling a TON better.
I wonder what else I am preventing the Lord from helping me with in my life? Because I am being stubborn? Or "leaning on my own understanding", because I am not "trusting in him" or "acknowledging him"? He has been teaching me a lot through all this. I don't have a conclusion to a lot of the things I am pondering. I still have a LOT of questions for him. I know if I am patient and willing to do what he would have me do he will answer these questions. This life isn't easy but I believe it is worth trying to do our best and following what we believe and know we should do. One thing I am learning is that what might be "right" for one isn't "right" for another. In some areas perhaps things are cut and dry. However we all need to seek guidance for ourselves and our families and not worry what other people may think or worry what someone else is doing. We are accountable for what we know and for what Heavenly Father tells us and teaches us.
A BIG reason I felt I need to change my children's eating habits and lifestyle is because my 3 older children have a family member who has diabetes. (Well they have have a family history of diabetes.) This particular family member has to be on kidney dialysis now, I think 3 times a week. She has been found in a coma on the floor, fallen a few times and wasn't able to get up til someone found her. Once she was laying there for more than 12 hours! She has lived a sedentary life most of her life. The lifestyle choices she has made I believe has led her to this point. (I love her very much and she is a great woman.) And it is sad my children probably won't have her in their lives much longer. So Waiting til tomorrow isn't the time to eat better/ exercise.... if you want to live a long time. And I DO. I want to live to over 100 yrs. old, Lord willing. I have too much to learn. Also teaching our children when they are young will "hopefully" help them choose a healthier lifestyle when they are out of our house. That is my goal.
How to do this is one of my questions though. I can't continue to "force" my children to eat and not eat things. Can I? If they don't learn to "choose for themselves" they will be in the world and not know how to navigate it on there own. Mommy won't be with them forever to make them healthy foods. So now is the time for me to teach I guess. I won't make them junk foods in my house in order to have them choose between things. This is the struggle. My beliefs are so strong some foods I view as "poisons" and can't allow them to "choose" them. When they are out of the house.
Logan will serve a mission and may not have access to these food choices that he has now. So what then?
I have got a LOT to learn and I am sure I have only scratched the surface.
I told you at one time earlier when I started this blog that wanted to share with you my struggles as I go along this journey. That is what I just did. Hopefully I can help others and teach others though the things I have learned.
Now to find others like me! Let me know who you are. Come on, come out of the "wood work" and get out there with me. I need to know..... Are there are other "EXTREMEly Different People" out there? LOL
Here's to being Wisdom Fed
Humbly,
Gretchen
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